Catholic coffee

NO OFFENCE, CATHOLIC PALS !!!

Four Catholic men and a Catholic woman were having coffee.


The first Catholic man tells his friends, "My son is a priest, when he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father'."

The second Catholic man chirps, "My son is a Bishop. When he walks into a room people call him 'Your Grace'."

The third Catholic gent says, "My son is a Cardinal. When he enters a room everyone says 'Your Eminence'."

The fourth Catholic man then says, "My son is the Pope. When he walks into a room people call him 'Your Holiness'."

Since the lone Catholic woman was sipping her coffee in silence, the four men give her a subtle, "Well....?"

She proudly replies, "I have a daughter,


Slim,


Tall,


38D breast,


24" waist and


34" hips.


When she walks into a room, people say, "Oh My God."

Ah Beng, you want peanuts?

Ah Beng is a bus driver; one day got this old folks home "pao" his bus
for a day trip to Pulau Ketam.

Sitting right behind the driver's seat is Grandma Sue and from his
rear mirror Ah Beng can see that Grandma Sue is happily munching away.

In the middle of the road trip, Grandma Sue tapped Ah Beng on his
shoulder and asked him...

Grandma: "Ah Beng ah! You want peanuts boh? Grandma treat you eat
peanut ai mai?"
Ah Beng: "Tenkiu ah ma... yes I want!"

Then Ah Beng also happy happy munching peanuts... about 20 minutes
down the road, Grandma Sue asked Ah Beng again...

Grandma: "Ah Beng ah! You want peanuts boh? Grandma treat you eat
peanut ai mai?"
Ah Beng: "Tenkiu ah ma ... yes I want!"

To make the story short, this goes on for a few more times then Ah
Beng finally asks Grandma Sue...

Ah Beng: "Ah ma ah .! .. you dont eat peanuts one meh?"
Grandma: "No... no eat! Ah ma boh teeth la!"
Ah Beng: "Aiks! Boh teeth then why ah ma buy peanuts leh?"
Grandma: "No choice leh! Just now that 7-11 is out of chocolate so ah
ma kena buy this peanut chocolate lor! Ah ma lick the chocolate around
the peanut and the peanut give you eat lor!"