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All these posts are just sharings from friends' e-mails. Don't like it? You can choose to stop reading :) Feel like sharing what you like? Kindly to e-mail me at NathDeCoco@gmail.com ^_^

Friday, March 27, 2009

Friendship - Who Is A True Friend

We all have friends. A lot gets talked about friendships. Everyone wants a true friend, and many of us believe that we have a friend who can be called a true friend. What kind of relations do friends share? When can we call a friend a true friend, and when can our friends take us as their true friend. After a romantic relationship, friendships are the most important relationships we can have. Though all of us have family and distant family, most of us rely on friends for advice, comfort and inspiration. How do we define a relation that can be called as one of true friendship?

The very first sign of a very good friend, not necessarily a true friend is that we are not worried about courtesies. You will call your friend at any hour and talk without any thought of time in your mind. Similarly, whenever you need support, you will call a very good friend and ask him/her to help you out. They expect the same from you. Another important trait of such relations is that we are not much worried about exposing ourselves. We speak about everything in our mind without worrying about what our friends will think. We are sure that they will take our talk in the spirit it was made. We are unguarded and open with friends in our talk.

A true friend is a little more than a very good friend. A true friend will support you even if it hurts his/her own interest. A true friend will understand your motives and needs and will be with you without any analysis or criticism. A true friend will come forward to help without any request and be with us in need without showing it or expecting anything in return. With a true friend, you can be sure that you will get help to the extent possible by him/her. Nothing will remain unturned. A mother is a true friend of her children. If we share such relations with an adult we can say that we are true friends.

A true friend makes no excuses of having work or appointments or anything but will be with you whenever you need him/her. In your hour of desperation, a true friend will support you even if the whole world opposes you. A true friend is not an opportunist. A true friend means to have someone who is like mother, as I said earlier. Instead of having hundreds of good friends, if you have a true friend, treat yourself lucky. If you can also become a true friend of someone, you will be blessed, because it is much easier for all of us to expect but very difficult to give. Be a true friend yourself first.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Which type of friend are you to me?

Some people will ask me what is my right to find a friend after what I've said recently. Well, I'm not sure about you but you might get my answers if you understand this simple differences that I share in here.

Simple vs Real

Anyone can stand by you when you are right, but a Friend will stand by you even when you are wrong...

A simple friend identifies himself when he calls. A real Wicfriend doesn't have to.

A simple friend opens a conversation with a full news bulletin on his life.

A real friend says, "What's new with you?"

A simple friend thinks the problems you whine about are recent.

A real friend says, "You've been whining about the same thing for 14 years. Get off your duff and do something about it."

A simple friend has never seen you cry. A real friend has shoulders soggy from your tears.

A simple friend doesn't know your parents' first names. A real friend has their phone numbers in his address book.

A simple friend hates it when you call after he has gone to bed. A real friend asks you why you took so long to call.

A simple friend seeks to talk with you about your problems. A real friend seeks to help you with your problems.

A simple friend, when visiting, acts like a guest. A real friend opens your refrigerator and helps himself.

A simple friend thinks the friendship is over when you have an argument.

A real friend knows that it's not a friendship until after you've had a fight.

A simple friend expects you to always be there for them. A real friend expects to always be there for you!

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Ah Pek and Ah Ma

Ah Pek and Ah Ma in Their Golden Years

Ah Pek and Ah Ma were lying in bed one night.

The husband was falling asleep but the wife felt romantic and wanted to talk.

She said, "You used to hold my hand when we were courting."

Wearily, he reached across, held her hand for a second and tried to get back to sleep.

A few moments later she said, "Then, you used to kiss me."

Mildly irritated, he reached across, gave her a peck on the cheek and settled down to sleep.

Thirty seconds later she said, "Then, you used to bite my neck."

Angrily, he threw back the bed covers, got out of bed and walk away.

"Where are you going?" she asked.

"To get my teeth lah!"

---

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

I can't speak Hokkien, so I'm learning Swahili

Originally from The Electric New Paper

I can't speak Hokkien, so I'm learning Swahili
HABARI za asubuhi, babu, wariye?
By Ng Tze Yong
22 March 2009


HABARI za asubuhi, babu, wariye?

Before you hit 'send' on a complaint e-mail, be assured that's not a keyboard error.

It's Swahili for: 'Good morning, ah kong, eat already or not?'

If you're still in school, picture the day you become an 'ah kong' (grandfather in Chinese).

When your grandkids come bouncing along to visit you as you lounge in your wheelchair, what language will they use?

It may be English or Mandarin or, who knows, perhaps Swahili.

That's right. Swahili - one of Africa's mother tongues.

Economies can rise and fall in a single generation. For all we know, business or cultural opportunities might spring up in Africa.

It's got people (almost a billion of them). It's got resources (it's where those blood diamonds came from). So, despite its current woes, let's not rule out Africa in the 22nd century.

If this comes to pass, we'll probably embrace Swahili because Singaporeans know very well that for a small country to survive and thrive in an ever-changing world, we must go with the linguistic flow.

So say 'jambo' (hello in Swahili).

(It's actually easier than Mandarin!)

Appreciating language as culture

Together with the pragmatic learners of language (those who embrace its utilitarian value), hopefully there will also be those who seek out new languages out of a broad appreciation of different cultures.

All languages have stories to tell. And many are going extinct.

As a French academic noted, 'half of the 6,000 or so languages in the world today are spoken by fewer than 10,000 people and a quarter by less than 1,000. Only a score are spoken by hundreds of millions of people.'

So, many cultures will disappear without leaving any trace as languages die. At least 30,000 have already vanished.

'Languages usually have a relatively short life span as well as a very high death rate. Only a few, including Basque, Egyptian, Chinese, Greek, Hebrew, Latin, Persian, Sanskrit and Tamil, have lasted more than 2,000 years,' says Mr Ranka Bjeljac-Babic, from the University of Poitiers.

So, how would I feel if my grandkids come up to me spouting a new language?

I'd feel what my own ah kong feels now - resignation, that his own grandson can't speak Hokkien to save his life.

But just as he tries to keep up with the times - the one and only English word he knows is 'good' - I'll try too.

'Nzuri,' I'll say.

Good that the young are reaching out to other languages and cultures.

Good that the stories embedded in languages are being kept alive.

But not so good if our own stories wither away due to the neglect of the languages we grew up with.

If only we could all learn three or more languages. But unfortunately for most people, the human brain is not wired to learn so many.

Now, what's the word for 'pity' in Swahili?

Monday, March 23, 2009

Osama To Bush

Osama Bin Laden heard that Bush was wondering whether he was still alive..

He decided to send George Bush a letter in his own handwriting to let him know he was still in the game.

Bush opened the letter and it appeared to contain a single line of coded message: 370HSSV-0773H

Bush was baffled, so he e-mailed it to Condi Rice. Condi and her aides had no clue either, so they sent it to the FBI.

No one could solve it at the FBI so it went to the CIA, then to the NASA.

With no clue as to its meaning they eventually asked Britain's MI-6 for help.

Within a minute MI-6 cabled the White House with this reply......

"Tell the President he's holding the message upside down."

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Erotic Jewelry

To all the Horny ones: Photos of a collection of erotic jewelry. Would you want to buy anything?


Friday, March 20, 2009

Chinese S’poreans should focus on learning Mandarin well, says MM Lee

The trend of Chinese dialects dying out in Singapore is irreversible, said Minister Mentor Lee Kuan Yew, who urged Singaporeans to focus more energy on learning Mandarin instead.

Speaking at the 30th anniversary of the Speak Mandarin Campaign on Tuesday, Mr Lee said the key challenge is no longer about Mandarin versus dialects, but about getting more Chinese Singaporeans to speak Mandarin to their children.

Mastering both English and Mandarin is not an easy task for most children, including the minister mentor’s grandchildren. He said among the seven of them, only one prefers to use Mandarin, whereas the rest often answer in English when he asks them questions in Mandarin.

Mr Lee urged parents to help their children master the language at home. "If both (parents) can speak Mandarin, don’t speak to your child in English, or one in English and one in Chinese. Speak to them in Mandarin, leave their English alone — they will master it," he said.

Research has shown that it is difficult for most children to cope with two languages which are as diverse as English and Mandarin.

According to a study done by Cornelius Kubler, an American professor who teaches Mandarin to US foreign service officers, it takes four times as long to train someone to a level where they can function professionally in Mandarin, compared to other languages like French, German and Spanish.

That is why Mr Lee said there is a need to build a strong Mandarin foundation in children.

On learning dialects, the minister mentor said it causes negative interferences with the learning of Mandarin and English because dialects have different vocabulary, phonetics and syntax.

"Today’s Zaobao had a whole series of middle aged and older generation saying we must have dialects. If you’ve got 100 gigabytes here, then you can put it in. But you haven’t got 100 gigabytes...

"And the more you use dialects, the less you will use your Mandarin. Your Mandarin will go down, your English will not go down because you have to use it," Mr Lee said.

He added that if the government had left language habits to evolve undirected, Chinese Singaporeans would be speaking an adulterated Hokkien—Teochew dialect.

Mr Lee also said the value of a language is its usefulness. If one speaks Hokkien or Cantonese, one could only reach some 60 million people in Fujian and Taiwan, or about 100 million in Guangdong and Hong Kong. With Mandarin, one can reach 1.3 billion Chinese from all provinces in China.

Statistics from the Education Ministry showed that the proportion of Chinese families in Singapore who speak dialects at home has dropped significantly in the past 30 years.

It fell below 10 per cent in 1988 and continued on a downward trend. Since 2001, less than 2 per cent of Chinese students in each cohort have come from dialect—speaking homes, demonstrating that the majority of parents prefer their children to focus on learning English and Mandarin well.

"Did you watch the Beijing Olympics Opening? I was there. I was watching the reactions of the foreign leaders and I knew that they knew this is a country that is going to rise," Mr Lee added.

He said Singapore is useful to China because we have access to the English—speaking world and have developed links with them due to our language policy. At the same time, Singaporeans are fluent in Mandarin; hence we can communicate with those in China and help them understand the West.

As part of this year’s Speak Mandarin Campaign, the Promote Mandarin Council will launch a challenge in two weeks to encourage Chinese Singaporeans to embrace Chinese language and culture.

Originally taken from Channel News Asia

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Tales from the crypt in Singapore

Wong Shun Feng says he has seen spirits, been afflicted by supernatural phenomena and taken advice from gods -- and that it's all just part of the job.

Affectionately known to his friends as "Tua Ya Pek" after a Taoist god of the spiritual underworld, Wong is a gravedigger who exhumes the bones of the dead to make way for development in Singapore.

According to Taoist belief, Wong is among the first to greet the dead when they embark on their journey beyond the grave.

But instead of guiding the spirits towards reincarnation, nirvana (transcendence) or the "nine hells," he sends them to a new earthly resting place as cemeteries make way for roads, housing and public services.

The dead are not always willing to move, he says.

"I've seen spirits hovering beside me as I dig their grave, heard them whisper to me 'Ah Tee (young man), please don't move me'," Wong recalls matter-of-factly.

But not all spirits are so benign, he said.

The 53-year-old, who has been a gravedigger for almost 30 years, says he once saw a tree standing over a grave he was exhuming "shaking violently when trees next to it were still -- and there was no breeze".

He said once he was even "punished" for disrespecting the dead when he swore at a grave.

"In the evening after the dig, my left forearm was completely stiff even though I did not injure it, like the forearm of a corpse, and it was only after midnight that I regained use of it," said Wong, gesturing to the affected area.

Nevertheless, he says he is not afraid of the supernatural.

"As long as you have a good heart, they won't harm you," he said.

Neither does he care that people here might look down on him as an anachronism in a Westernised society, despite the fact that superstition has deep roots among ethnic Chinese, who account for 75 percent of the 3.6 million population.

"People might think that this type of work is taboo but I'm fine with it. I like the rugged life," he said.

A stocky man, Wong cuts an imposing figure with a variety of tattoos, the most prominent of which are the images of Tua Ya Pek and Li Ya Pek emblazoned across his chest and back.

The images of the two Taoist deities, who are said to be in charge of keeping spirits in line, are not there for decoration.

"I respect the gods, that's why I tattoo them on my body," said Wong, who claims to have seen apparitions of the gods and received lessons on life and work from them.

On a recent exhumation conducted by the Singapore Land Authority to clear a Chinese cemetery in northern Singapore for redevelopment, it took Wong and three colleagues nearly three hours to dig a narrow hole about four metres (12 feet) deep.

Using simple tools such as plowshares, crowbars and wicker baskets, they burrowed through soil, sand and cement, which the rich used in the past to seal their graves, before finally reaching the coffin.

Prying open the lid, Wong and another gravedigger picked out the bones and washed them with rice wine before handing them to the family, who gave them red packets containing token sums of money in appreciation.

These envelopes are the main source of income for gravediggers because the 100 dollar (65 US) payment for each exhumation only goes to one individual and the gravediggers take turns receiving it.

"The income is not fixed. It depends on how generous the families are with their red packets," said Wong.

As the work is not stable he supplements his earnings with odd jobs such as house painting and repairs.

But he has his hands full for the moment as the 70,000-square-metre (753,000-square-feet) Guang Xiao Shan Cemetery, near the border with Malaysia, has been earmarked for conversion into a train depot.

The pace of Singapore's development has meant that between 1970 and 1998, more than 240,000 graves in 100 cemeteries were exhumed, the latest available estimate shows.

And according to Wong, all the deceased, including the current "residents," must be placated.

"Ghosts are the same as human beings," he said. "They have feelings and emotions as well. How would you feel if you had to shift after living in the same place for 50 years?"

When asked about his own mortality, Wong shrugged as he pointed to the tattoo of the deity Li Ya Pek smiling serenely on his chest.

"I haven't really thought about it. Let's see what my big brother says," he said with a laugh.

Originally taken from yahoo news

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

SBOI - Post, 10 commandments for peace of mind

1.   Do not interfere in others' business unless asked.

Most of us create our own problems by interfering too often in others' affairs.  We do so because somehow we have convinced ourselves that our way is the best way, our logic is the perfect logic, and those who do not conform to our thinking must be criticized and steered to the right direction, our direction.

This kind of attitude on our part denies the existence of individuality and consequently the existence of God, for God has created each one of us in a unique way.  No two human beings can think or act in exactly the same way. All men or women act the way they do because they are prompted to do so by the Divine within them.  There is God to look after everything.  Why are you bothered?  Mind your own business and you will have your peace.

2.  Forget and forgive

This is the most powerful aid to peace of mind.  We often nurture ill feeling inside our heart for the person who insults or harms us.  We foster grievances, which in turn results in loss of sleep, develops of stomach ulcer, high blood pressure and many other ailments that stealthily gnaws us from within.

We forget that the insult or injury was done to us once but by nourishing the grievance we go on excavating the wound forever.  Therefore it is essential that we cultivate the art of forgiving and forgetting.  Believe in the justice of God and the doctrine of Karma.  Let Him judge the act of the one who insulted you.  Life is too short to waste in such trifles.

Forget, forgive, and march on.

3.  Do not crave for recognition

This world is full of selfish people.  They seldom praise anybody without selfish motive.  They may praise you today because you are rich and have power but no sooner you are powerless, they will forget your achievement and start criticizing you. Moreover, each person is a mortal with a bundle of defects in them.  No one individual is picture perfect.  Then why do you value the words of praise of another mortal like you?  Why do you crave for such false recognition and lose your peace of mind if the world does not praise you?  Believe in yourself.  People's praises do not last long and are not worth it.  Do your duties ethically and sincerely and leave the rest to God. 

4.  Do not be jealous

We all have experienced how jealousy can disturb our peace of mind.  You know you work harder than your colleagues in the office do, but they get promotions, you do not.  You started a business several years ago but youare not as successful as your neighbor whose business is only one year old. There are several examples like these in every walk of life.  Should you be jealous?  No, remember everybody's life is shaped by his previous Karma that has now become his destiny.  If you are destined to be rich, not all the world can stop you.  If you are not so destined, no one can help you
either.  Nothing will be gained by blaming others for your misfortune. Jealousy will not get you anywhere, but will only give you restlessness.

5.  Change yourself according to the environment

If you try to change the environment single handedly, the chances are you may fail.  Instead, change yourself to suit the environment.  As you do this, even the environment, which has remained unfriendly for you, will mysteriously appear to be congenial and harmonious.

6.  Endure what cannot be cured

This is the best way to turn a disadvantage into an advantage.  Every day we face numerous inconveniences, ailments, irritations and accidents that are beyond our control.  We must learn to put up with these things.  We must learn to endure them cheerfully thinking, "God will it so, so be it". God's logic is beyond our comprehension.  Believe it and you will gain in patience, in inner strength, in will power.

7.  Do not bite more than you can chew

This maxim should be always remembered.  We often tend to take more responsibilities than we are capable to carry out.  This is done to satisfy our ego.  Know your limitations.  Why take on additional loads that may create more worries? You cannot gain peace of mind by expanding your external activities.  If you have extra time, then spend it in an inwardlife of prayer, introspection and meditation.  This will reduce those thoughts in your mind, which make you restless.  Fewer the thoughts, greater is the peace of mind.

8.  Meditate regularly

Meditation makes the mind thoughtless.  This is the highest state of peace of mind.  Try and experience it.  If you meditate earnestly for half an hour every day, you will tend to become calm during the remaining twenty-three and a half hours.  Your mind will not be disturbed as much as before.  You must gradually increase the period of daily meditation.  You may think this will interfere with your daily work.  On the contrary, this will increase your efficiency and you will turn out more work in less time.

9.  Never leave the mind vacant

Empty mind is the devil's workshop.  All evil deeds start in the mind. Keep your mind occupied in something positive, something worthwhile. Actively follow a hobby.  Do something that holds your interest.  You mustdecide what you value more - money or peace of mind.  Your hobby, like social work or temple work may not always earn you more money, but you will have a sense of fulfillment and achievement.  Even if you are resting physically, occupy yourself in healthy reading or mental chanting of God's name.

10.  Do not procrastinate and never regret

Do not waste time in wondering "should I or shouldn't I?"  Days, weeks, months and years may be wasted in that futile mental debating.  You can never plan enough because you can never anticipate all future happenings. Always remember God has His own plan too.  Value your time and do things. It does not matter if you fail the first time.  You can rectify your mistakes and succeed the next time.  Sitting back and worrying will lead to nothing.  Learn from your mistakes but do not brood over the past.  DO NOT REGRET! Whatever happened was destined to happen only that way.  Take it as the will of God.  You do not have the power to alter the course of God's will.  Why cry over the spilt milk?

"Live, love, learn..."

Monday, March 16, 2009

[Infocomm Live!] Start to Finish: Winning Ways of an Entrepreneur

Hey, I got an e-mail. Anyone had an idea what is this and is there anyone I know going for this???
Dear Nath,
We would like to extend an invitation for you to join us at the upcoming Infocomm Live! event featuring Matthias Kunze, serial entrepreneur and Managing Director of Yahoo! Mobile APAC.
Date: 20 March 2009
Time: 6.30pm - 9.30pm
Venue: Chamber, The Arts House, 1 Old Parliament Lane, Singapore 179429

Embracing your passion and finishing to the best of your ability in what you have started is what Matthias Kunze, entrepreneur, former national swimmer for the German team and Ironman triathlete lives by.

Currently the Managing Director for Yahoo! Mobile in Asia, Matthias will share with you inspirations that have led to his success and importantly, the winning ways of an entrepreneur.

Matthias has worked in the mobile advertising, publishing and television industries, and has successfully co-founded several companies in these areas, one of which was acquired by Yahoo! in 2007.

At Yahoo!, Matthias is responsible for extending Yahoo!’s mobile products, broadband services and digital home experiences in the region. Matthias also oversees the deployment and distribution of Yahoo!’s revolutionary mobile products such as Yahoo! oneSearch, Yahoo! Mobile services, as well as leading the mobile monetisation strategy across the Asia Pacific region.

This event is organized by the Infocomm Development Authority of Singapore (IDA), in partnership with E27 and The Digital Movement.


yon

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Testicle Therapy

Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole.

The ball hit one of the men.

He immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony.

The woman rushed down to the man, and immediately began to apologize. 'Please allow me to help. I'm a Physical Therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd allow me, she told him.

'Oh, no, I'll be all right. I'll be fine in a few minutes,' the man replied He was in obvious agony, lying in the fetal position, still clasping his hands there at his groin.

At her persistence, however, he finally allowed her to help. She gently took his hands away and laid them to the side, loosened his pants and put her hands inside.

She administered tender and artful massage for several long moments and asked, 'How does that feel'?

He replied: It feels great, but I still think my thumb's broken!

Friday, March 13, 2009

Three Kick Rule

A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural North Cowra. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence.

As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell in this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it."

The old farmer Peter replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming over here."

The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial lawyers in Australia and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own."

The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we settle disputes in North Cowra. We settle small disagreements like this with the 'Three Kick Rule.'

The lawyer asked, "What is the 'Three Kick Rule'?"

The Farmer replied, "Well, because the dispute occurs on my land, I get to go first. I kick you three times and then you kick me three times and so on back and forth until someone gives up."

The lawyer quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.

The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the attorney. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel-toed work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees!

His second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last meal gushing from his mouth. The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer's third kick to his rear end, sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie.

Summoning every bit of his will and remaining strength the lawyer very slowly managed to get to his feet.. Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "Okay, you old fart. Now it's my turn."

(I love this part)

The old farmer smiled and said, "Nah, I give up. You can have the duck."

When you are educated, you'll believe only half of what you hear. When you're intelligent, you know which half?

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Actual excuse notes teachers have received, spelling mistakes included.

My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.

Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.

Dear School: Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.

Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.

Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.

John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.

Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.

Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.

Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.

Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.

Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his boots leak.

Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.

Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father's fault.

I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I don't know what size she wear.

Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday.

Sally won't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral.

My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the Marines.

Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.

Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.

Please excuse Burma, she has been sick and under the doctor.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Letter from the Chief Financial Officer

To: All Staff,

As you know, the realities of the downturn have hit home and I am forced to introduce the following cost-cutting measures to help shore up our beloved company. I know you will understand that the pain is temporary and the gains will be there for all of us to reap when the company comes through these difficult times stronger... and ready to ride the next big wave. So with immediate effect, all staff will be required to adhere to the following:

a. The cups on the two vending machines are to be recycled. Annabelle has already sterilised them.

b. Sabbatical leave: Executives booked for New York will now go to Kukup in Johor Bahru instead. Senior executives can go further - up to Yong Peng.

c. Our chalet lease in Pulau Ubin has ended. However, as the management takes a keen interest in staff welfare, we have arranged with Francis (from Admin Dept) to rent out one of his rooms at Blk 923, Pasir Ris Drive. His flat was chosen for its proximity to the sea and you can still see Ubin from the window.

d. Entertainment claims: Staff will be required to go for a 30-min demonstration by Raj from Finance Dept, who will show you how to withdraw your credit card slowly from your wallet (58 secs), so that others at a business lunch will inadvertently beat you to it when the bill comes.

e. The Valentine's Day white chocolates (Deluxeur) which I gave out in January : Those of you who have yet to open the box, please return them expiry date: Dec 2009).

f. Monthly Best Employee Award : The $1000 cash award will now be replaced by a box of Deluxeur white chocolates.

g. Annual Best Employee Award : The 14-day Disneyland/Hawaii tour and solid gold Rolex Oyster watch will be replaced by TWO boxes of Deluxeur white chocolates.

h. Medical: The Oxfordshire-Hopkins Medical Group will no more be on our panel. Annabelle will give you the address of Hong Tong Hong Medical Hall in Sungei Road. Bring your company pass for a 10% discount.

i. Country Club Memberships : Senior executives must return their membership cards to Annabelle, who will then register your name with Bishan Community Centre.

j. Transport Allowance : No reduction of rate! However, it will be paid on alternate months.

k. Gifts for clients : New choices. The Bohemian Crystal list will be replaced by the one from 7-eleven.

l. Annual Dinner & Dance : No change (March 20, yay!), but the venue is switched from The Ritz-Carlton to the void deck of Annabelle's flat in Ang Mo Kio Avenue 10.

m. Bonus : This time, staff welfare comes first! Instead of the usual amount, we raised it up to $2 million. Each employee will be given a Singapore Sweep ticket. The draw is on March 5.


From: Chief Financial Officer

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

MY DOG "SEX"

When I adopted a dog, I decided to give it an unusual name. After some hard thinking, I decided to call him "SEX". Well, SEX is a very embarrassing name.

One day I took SEX for a walk an he ran away from me. I spent hours looking for SEX. A policeman came along and asked me what I was doing in the alley at 4am in the morning. I said I was looking for SEX. My case came up in the following week.

One day, I went to get a license for SEX. The clerk asked me what I wanted. I told him I wanted a license for SEX. He said, "I would like to have one too." then I said, "You don't understand, I had SEX since I was ten years old." He replied, "You must have been a strong boy."

When I decided to get married, I told the minister I wanted to have SEX at the wedding. He told me to wait until after the wedding. I said, "But SEX has played a big part in my life and my whole lifestyle revolves around SEX." He said he did not want to hear about my personal life and would not marry us in this church. I told him everybody coming to the wedding would enjoy having SEX there. The next day, we were married by the justice of peace. My family was barred from the church.

My wife and I took the dog with us along on the honeymoon. When I checked into the motel, I told the clerk I wanted a room for my wife and myself and also a special room for SEX. The clerk said that every room in the motel is for SEX. Then I said, "You don't understand, SEX keeps me awake at night," and the clerk said, "Me too."

One day I told a friend I had SEX on TV. He said,"Show off." I told him it was a contest, and he told me I should have sold tickets.

When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight custody of the dog. I said,"Your Honour, I had SEX before I was married." And the judge said,"Me too."

Well now, I have been thrown in jail, been married, divorced, and had more damned trouble with the dog than I ever bargained for. Why, just the other day, when I went for the first session with the psychiatrist and she asked me what the problem was, and I replied,"Hell, SEX has died and left my life. It's like losing a best friend and it's so lonely." The doctor said, "Look Mister, you and I know that SEX isn't a man's best friend, so get yourself a dog."

Sunday, March 8, 2009

AVOID THESE MEDICATIONS

Not sure if we have these flu & sinus medicine in Singapore. Some are prescribed for children... I got from friend. 
 

Take note! 



Good Day Family/Friends,


Subject: Phenylpropanolamine (PPA)

I would like to thank those of you who expressed condolences on the recent passing of my mother.
 
She suffered a hemorrhagic stroke while she was driving home from my house on 7/30 and passed away on 8/3.
 
My mother's stroke and passing was an enormous shock to my family because she did not have any symptoms or risk factors for a stroke.
 
Just the week before she had gone to her doctor for a check up and received a clean bill of health.


She did, however, develop a cold while she was visiting me and had taken Alka Seltzer Cold Plus for 3 days.

Since her passing, we have learned that Alka Seltzer is one of the many cold medicines that contains Phenylpropanolamine (PPA) which can cause hemorrhagic stokes or cerebral bleeding even with the first use.
 
I am forwarding a list of other medications that currently use PPA.
 
These medicines are supposedly being recalled but my mother just purchased this medication less than two weeks ago.
 
Pharmaceutical companies have known about this danger for years, we unfortunately, did not.

I urge you to review the list of medicines with PPA and avoid these medications.
 
All drugs containing PHENYL PROPANOLAMINE are dangerous.
 
You may want to try calling the 800 number listed on most drug boxes and inquire about a REFUND. Please read this CAREFULLY.
 
Also, please pass this on to everyone you know. STOP TAKING anything containing this ingredient.
 
It has been linked to increased hemorrhagic stroke (bleeding in brain) among women ages 18-49 in the three days after starting use of medication.
 
Problems were not found in men, but the FDA recommended that everyone (even children) seek alternative medicine.

The following medications contain Phenylpropanolamine:

Acutrim Diet Gum Appetite Suppressant
Acutrim Plus Dietary Supplements
Acutri m Maximum Strength Appetite Control

Alka-Seltzer Plus Children's Cold Medicine Effervescent
Alka-Seltzer Plus Cold medicine (cherry or or ange)
Alka-Seltzer Plus Cold Medicine Original
Alka-Seltzer Plus Cold & Cough Medicine Effervescent

Alka-Seltzer Plus Cold & Flu Medicine
Alka-Seltzer Plus Cold & Sinus Effervescent
Alka Seltzer Plus Night-Time Cold Medicine

BC Allergy Sinus Cold Powder
BC Sinus Cold Powder

Comtrex Flu Therapy & Fever Relief

Day & Night Contac 12-Hour Cold Capsules

Contac 12 Hour Caplets

Coricidin D Cold, Flu & Sinus

Dexatrim Caffeine Free
Dexatrim Extended Duration
Dexatrim Gelcaps
Dexatrim Vitamin C/Caffeine Free

Dimetapp Cold &Allergy Chewable Tablets
Dime tapp Cold &Cough Liqui-Gels
Dimetapp DM Cold &Cough Elixir
Dimetapp Elixir

Dimetapp 4 Hour Liquid Gels
Dimetapp 4 Hour Tablets
Dimetapp 12 Hour Extentab s Tablets

Naldecon DX Pediatric Drops

Permathene Mega-16

Robitussin CF


Tavist-D 12 Hour Relief of Sinus &Nasal Congestion


Triaminic DM Cough Relief
Triaminic Expectorant Chest & Head

Triaminic Syrup (! !) Cold & Allergy
Triaminic Triaminicol Cold & Cough

I just found out and called the 800# on the container for Triaminic and
they informed me that they are voluntarily recalling the following
medicines because of a certain ingredient that is causing strokes and
seizures in children:


Orange 3D Cold & Allergy Cherry (Pink)3D Cold &Cough Berry
3D Cough Relief Yellow 3D Expectorant

They are asking you to call them at  800-548-3708  with the lot number on
the box so they can send you postage for you to send it back to them,
and they will also issue you a refund. If you know of anyone else with
small children,

To confirm these findings please take time to check the following:

http://www.fda.gov/cder/drug/infopage/ppa/ 

Saturday, March 7, 2009

Planning to stay back for OT?? Think again...




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Moral of the story : In these cost cutting days Leave office early

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Why Women should not take husbands shopping! GREAT

BANNED FROM WAL-MART... 

This is why women should not take men shopping against their will.

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart.

Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get 1in and get out. Equally unfortunately, my wife is like most women - she loved to browse.

Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Wal-Mart:

Dear Mrs. Samsel,

Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr. Samsel are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away.'

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.

6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the 'Mission Impossible' theme.

12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!' And last, but not least.

15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, and then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!'

Monday, March 2, 2009

Singapore's Merlion tourism icon struck by lightning

Last night my ex was laughing over this news when we're chatting on msn. This morning got this e-mail.

Singapore's Merlion stone sculpture, popular with tourists, has been temporarily closed for repairs after being struck by lightning, the Singapore Tourism Board said Sunday.

The lightning bolt struck the 36-year old sculpture -- a lion's head with a mermaid's tail -- at the mouth of the Singapore River on the southern waterfront during a Saturday afternoon thunderstorm.

A small section of the mane on the left side of the lion head and its right ear were chipped off as a result, while the wave form at its sculpture's base also suffered a crack.

The lightning strike scattered debris and sent about 20 to 30 people, including tourists, who were in the area, running for cover, the Straits Times newspaper reported. A local television news channel said orange sparks flew and a loud explosion was heard at the time.

But the agency's statement said no one was hurt in the incident.

It said it "has engaged contractors to investigate the cause of the incident and carry out immediate assessment of the structure and repairs."

The Merlion, although an icon created by the tourism agency, has some elements of myths related to Singapore's ancient history.

The name Singapore comes from "Singapura," a mixture of Malay and Sanskrit, which means "Lion City." It was given that name apparently because a Hindu prince in ancient times had spotted a lion-like creature when he landed on the island.

Singapore faced a spate of fierce thunderstorms over the weekend.

The lightning strike on the Merlion is being seen as an ill omen by some in the Internet community. One blog wayangparty said, "Just when you think things cannot get worse, our tourist icon -- the Merlion -- was struck by lightning!"

"In ancient China, natural disasters are usually a harbinger of a change in the "mandate of heaven," it noted.

Originally from breitbart